Painful Sex

Many women who complain about low libidos actually experience pain during sex, according to Dr Elna Rudolph, head of the multi-disciplinary team at My Sexual Health in Pretoria.

“When it comes to sex, some medical practitioners feel out of their depth. They know that when sex is painful it can cause a massive divide in a relationship, but they don’t know how to address the issue and they often end up telling the patient there is nothing ‘wrong’ with her, because a clinical examination does not reveal any overt pathology like visible lesions, discharges or anatomical abnormalities.  As a result, patients tend to move from one medical practitioner to the next hoping for a solution. In some instances, it takes years before she is diagnosed and treated.”

Dr Rudolph noted that every time a woman is told that there is nothing wrong with her or that it is ‘all in her head’, she interprets it as meaning there is in fact something seriously wrong with her, because nobody can figure it out.

She appealed to doctors to refrain from using the phrase ‘it is all in your head’ when consulting a patient who complains about painful sex.  Rather say that you cannot find the cause for the pain and refer her to a centre that specialises in the management of painful intercourse.

An Approach to Dyspareunia:

The DSM V now reads Genito-Pelvic Pain/Penetration Disorders and throws all causes for dyspareunia under one psychiatric diagnosis.  The fact that it is in the DSM V acknowledges that dyspareunia has a significant psychological impact on a patient, but it should not be interpreted as “sexual pain is all in the mind.”  This umbrella-term certainly also does not aid in diagnosing and treating the cause of the pain.  The next section aims to provide an approach to dyspareunia: Pain during sex can be either deep or superficial.

Deep Dyspareunia:

Gynaecological Disorders:

Deep pain usually signals a gynaecological problem like ovarian cysts, fibroids, endometriosis, occasionally a retroverted uterus (although this is a relatively common finding, it is seldom the cause of the pain), pelvic inflammatory disease and neoplastic disorders.  If the patient has deep dyspareunia and the cause cannot be diagnosed and or treated by the GP, referral to a gynaecologist is very important.

Bowel Disorders:

Irritable or Inflammatory Bowel Disease as well as simple constipation can cause dyspareunia.  If there is any occult faecal blood, weight loss or any other danger sign, the patient should be referred for colonoscopy.

Bladder Disorders:

A chronic, untreated urinary tract infection and other bladder pathology can cause painful intercourse.  A condition that is often missed is painful bladder syndrome, formerly known as interstitial cystitis.  This is now seen as a pain disorder involving central sensitization rather than being an organic disease.  The patient experiences pain over the bladder and what feels like chronic or recurrent urinary tract infections, but with sterile urine with or without hematuria.  If there is hematuria, urological referral is advised.  If not, it should be treated like a pain disorder in the context if an experienced multi-disciplinary team.  Medications that are used include anti-histamines, gabapentin, pregabalin, amitriptyline, duloxetine, anti-inflammatories, muscle relaxants, etc.

Other Causes:

Repeated abdominal and pelvic surgeries contribute to a large portion of deep dyspareunia.  It also sometimes seen in patients who over-train their core muscles like pilates instructors, triathletes and dancers.  In these cases, referral for myofascial release by a specialist pelvic function physiotherapist can solve the problem.

Superficial Dyspareunia:

Superficial pain is experienced around the vaginal opening and on attempted penetration. Patients usually describes a sharp stinging, burning or tearing sensation and that it feels like her partner is hitting a wall inside her vagina.

It is important to distinguish between localised and generalised pain.

Localised:

Localised pain can be organic and nociceptive in nature with a clear cause like a visible herpes ulcers or fissures.  In the cases where there is a lesion with an unknown cause, especially if it does not respond to empirical therapy in two weeks, a biopsy should be taken to make the correct diagnosis.  Lichen Sclerosis, Erosive Lichen Planus, Spongiotic Dermatitis and undiagnosed Genital Herpes are common causes of localised genital pain.  To take a biopsy of normal looking skin or mucosa is usually of no value – it will just show mild inflammatory changes and make no contribution to the diagnosis or the treatment plan.

Fissures:

Fissuring or splitting of the posterior fourchette – which can occur at the first attempt at sex or years later –  can cause pain that is described as: ‘like a paper-cut’, ‘knife-like’ or as a tearing sensation.  They have mild to severe pain with penetration and might tear when inserting tampons or during gynaecological examination. They often see bleeding or spotting after sex and will complain of itching, burning or stinging when the area comes into contact with semen, water or urine.  An examination will reveal a tiny split or linear erosion at the midline of the base of the vagina on the perineal skin. In addition, the posterior fourchette may form a tight band or tent (membranous hypertrophy).  Splitting occurs when the posterior fourchette is pulled into the vagina and experiences friction from thrusting, especially if there is not enough lubrication or if the mucosa is atrophic due to hormonal changes.  Correcting the hormonal imbalance, using a non-irritating protective substance like Aquaphor, using a silicone lubricant and making sure the fragile part does not get pushed into the vagina during penetration by manually pulling down on it with a thumb when inserting the penis, works very well.  If this does not help, it is usually due to an undiagnosed chronic infection or other skin condition and a biopsy is warranted.

Genito-Urinary Syndrome of Menopause:

Previously known as atrophic vaginitis, this condition causes significant discomfort and impairment of quality of life for older women.  If peri- or post-menopausal woman experiences pain during sex, it is probably due to a local oestrogen deficiency. They also experience significant urinary symptoms: they feel as though they have recurrent infections, when in fact they don’t and they often have trouble with incontinence as well.  Post- menopausal women who are on topical oestrogen are twice as like as their oestrogen-deficient peers to be sexually active.

Provoked Vestibulodynia:

A common form of localised pain where there is no visible pathology is Provoked Vestibulodynia.  This condition is easily diagnosed by touching the vestibule with a wet ear bud.  If the patient experiences a burning or stinging sensation, it is called allodynia and it is diagnostic.  The patient should be asked to rate the pain out of 10 at the following positions:  above the urethra, under the urethra, as well as at the the 4’O clock 6’O clock and 8’O clock positions.   This condition is due to neuroproliferation and can be genetic, due to recurrent infections or due to hormonal abnormalities caused by hormonal contraception or menopause.  If only the posterior aspect of the vestibule is affected, it is due to a hypertonic pelvic floor with irritation of the pudendal nerve.

Oral contraceptives, especially the low-dose anti-androgenic ones cause a relative oestrogen and testosterone deficiency in the vestibillum, which induces neuroproliferation, in some women.  It is more likely to happen in those who start off with congenital neuroproliferation around the vaginal opening.  You will find that those patients also have a sensitive umbilicus.  Look out for vestibulodynia in the patients with the sensitive umbilicus, those who can’t use tampons and first-time pill users.

Recurrent infections can also cause neuroproliferation, but one of the biggest contributors in those with recurrent infections is the repeated use of topical anti-fungals.  In a sensitive vestibule, it causes a chemical dermatitis that feels like and infection, but is only worsened by continuous use of topical agents.  Do a vaginal swab and ask for sensitivity to be done on the candida if there is any.  We see many cases of candida glabrata and ducreii in clinical practice and it is most likely do to over-use of conventional anti-fungal treatments that selects for the resistant strains.  Only treat what you find on the swab and aim for oral treatment rather than topical treatment in these cases.

In our experience, women with very small labia minora and an exposed introitus are more likely to suffer from provoked vestibulodynia.  It is most likely due to higher exposure of the vestibule with irritation of the nerve-endings.

Provoked Vestibulodynia is treated by taking away the cause of the neuroproliferation, restoring the hormonal balance of the vestibule, treating the associated neuropathic pain and correcting the pelvic floor hypertonicity if it is present.

Hypertonic Pelvic Floor:

Almost all cases of superficial pain will have some degree of pelvic floor hypertonicity.  It is often a chicken-and-egg situation where one is not sure if the muscle spasm caused the nerve irritation or if it was the other way around.  The most important aspect of the treatment of superficial dyspareunia is making sure that the pelvic floor has normal tone.  In the presence of hypertonicitiy, the pain is maintained, and cure is very difficult.

Injury such as traumatic vaginal delivery, pelvic surgery, positional insults such as prolonged driving or occupations that require prolonged sitting, gait disturbances, traumatic injury to the back or pelvis, and sexual abuse can cause the muscles in the pelvic floor to go into spasm.

Vaginismus:

According to the DSM V the more up-to-date term to use would be a “penetration disorder” but with vaginismus there is a distinct phobic reaction and avoidance behaviour associated with attempts at penetration. A hypertonic pelvic floor certainly contributes to vaginismus.  In our clinic, most women with vaginismus also have another superficial pain disorder and the vaginismus is merely a response to repeated attempts at penetration that was extremely painful.  Most of our vaginismus patients have also never been able to use a tampon.  Some do have a history of sexual abuse and dysfunctional families, but that is actually a small percentage.  Almost all patients have a history of a strict religious upbringing, very little sex education as well as negative ideas and messages about sex from early childhood.

The research show that this condition is best managed in the context of a multi-disciplinary team.  These patients need to have the contributing medical conditions like provoked vestibulodynia diagnosed and treated, but they also need sex therapy, relationship therapy, cognitive behavioural therapy (where she learns to take control of her own vagina and what happens in her genital area), dilator therapy and physiotherapy by a women’s health physiotherapist who specialises in the treatment of sexual dysfunction (there is only a handful around!)  During the treatment process sex is forbidden but the couple is given sensate focus exercises to re-establish intimacy if it has dwindled and to rewire the women’s mind – she has to learn that sensual experiences are not always threatening can be pleasurable.  She also needs to get in touch with her sexual self – something that most patients suffering from vaginismus though would never be possible.

The patient will see each of the multi-disciplinary team members alone or with her partner a few times during the treatment period.  When we are satisfied that she is physically and emotionally ready to attempt penetration, it is done in a gradual manner where the partner first helps with dilators and then gently attempts penetration when they are both ready.

The process does consume a lot of resources: time, money, emotional energy, but it is all worth it in the end.  The treatment success of a program like this is very high, all over the world.

Generalised superficial pain:

Generalised superficial pain is often unprovoked and not only associated with intercourse, although an attempt at penetration can worsen the pain.  This is referred to Vulvodynia can be seen as a chronic pain syndrome. The pain usually comes and goes with some patients experiencing long pain-free intervals and some have constant pain that gets better and worse depending on a whole range of factors.

Pudendal Neuralgia:

A specific form of superficial pain is called pudendal neuralgia where patients experience a burning pain in the distribution of the pudendal nerve.  The pain can be in the whole area from the clitoris to the anus or only one specific branch.  It can also be unilateral or bilateral.  This pain usually gets worse when the patient is sitting and better if they are lying on their sides.  The treatment involves physiotherapy, pharmacotherapy with drugs like pregabalin or gabapentin, often pudendal nerve blocks (which is also diagnostic) and only occasionally surgery where a narrowing of Alcock’s canal can be demonstrated.

Chronic Pelvic Pain:

An estimated 40% of diagnostic laparoscopies and 12% of hysterectomies are performed for pelvic pain, according to Weiss et al.  Although diagnositic laparoscopy is necessary to diagnose some important causes of chronic pelvic pain like endometriosis, repeated exploratory laparoscopies and especially laparotomies is not advised.  In fact, it worsens the condition due to scar tissue formation and with worsening of myofascial pain.  This is a complicated condition with often no clear cause or multiple contributing factors.  In many cases, conventional treatment is ineffective and management by a multi-disciplinary team is required.

Other Chronic Pain Disorders:

Patients with disorders like fibromyalgia and rheumatoid arthritis have a higher incidence of dyspareunia – deep or superficial as well as chronic pelvic pain.  In these situations the underlying painful condition should be treated optimally, but it is often necessary to address the painful intercourse separate as well.

Persistent genital arousal disorder:

This condition is marked by constant or intermitted feeling of genital arousal with or without spontaneous orgasms. Its unwanted and not due to sexual stimulation or thoughts and causes significant distress for the patient.  Of late, this condition is seen as a type of genital pain disorder and is treated much like vulvodynia in specialised sexual pain centres.  Referral is advised.

Some useful tips

  • If a women complains about dyspareunia, ask her to tell you about the pain. Let her talk for a minute or two – the diagnosis is usually already clear if you just allow her to describe her symptoms.
  • Then get a good history and ask about her overall physical health and medication use.
  • If a woman is tense or scared, take the time to reassure her by giving her a step-by-step account of what you are going to do next. Start the examination with a general exam and then by touching her thighs – after informing her of your intension – then move to the vulva.
  • In addition, if the patient is scared, do not use a speculum at the first examination – a finger and an ear bud are all you need to diagnose the cause of superficial pain.
  • Always ask a patient to rate her pain on a scale of 1-10 and to describe the sensation. Make a note of this and compare it at the follow-up consultation.  If there is no improvement, refer the patient.

When people find out that I’m a “sex doctor”, it is either a great conversation starter or the ultimate convo killer. Yes, I’m a sex therapist – but I’m also a qualified medical doctor. Some think I watch people have sex, others think I just suggest kinky positions or toys and some don’t even allow their minds to go there. Many have mentioned that they would love to be a fly on the wall in my practice. So allow me to share some of what I’ve learnt over my years of getting people naked (once they leave my office). These four cases represent the most common reasons couples and singles book time with me. And the advice I give them will no doubt keep your bedroom fires burning…

 

The case: Unconsummated marriage

The couple: Erica and Paul, late twenties, married for seven years, both still virgins

Erica and Paul refrained from sex before marriage for religious reasons, but they were excited about finally having sex on their wedding night. They tried, but it felt like he was hitting a wall inside her vagina – it was impossible. Erica knew that the first few times can be uncomfortable, but nothing could have prepared her for the excruciating pain she experienced when Paul tried to insert his penis. She felt like he was cutting her open and after the attempt, the area would burn for hours. They tried lubrication, alcohol, sedatives, foreplay – nothing worked! They saw many doctors who told her that there is nothing wrong with her and psychologists who were convinced that she must have been abused, but she hadn’t been. When they came to see me, she could orgasm through other forms of stimulation, but they desperately wanted a baby.

The treatment: Take control of your vagina.

On examination, I discovered that Erica was born with a condition called Neuroproliferative Provoked Vestibulodynia, where there were too many nerve endings around her vaginal opening (and in her belly button!) The sensitivity made the muscles around her vagina contract, much like an eyelid protects the eye.

This sensitivity and resulting muscle spasm made inserting tampons impossible, never mind a penis! We had to take the sensitivity away, relax the muscles and teach Erica’s brain that something can be inserted into her vagina without causing her pain. In my examination room, she inserted something into her vagina for the first time – an ear bud! A specialist pelvic function physiotherapist taught her relaxation techniques and how to use her pelvic floor muscles. She practiced at home with vaginal dilators every day and applied a special cream around her vagina to help the nerve problem.

Within four weeks, Erica was able to insert a dilator the size of an erect penis into her vagina without any physical or psychological discomfort. Paul then began to help with the dilators and he also attended a few of the physiotherapy sessions. After a follow-up with me, they got the “all-clear” and were able to carefully attempt penetration at home. Success! The better news? Erica popped into my office a few weeks ago – pregnant with their second baby!

 

The case: He comes early – every time

The patient: Nkosi, 35, single

Every time he had sex, Nkosi ejaculated within less than a minute of penetration. At times it was so bad that he ejaculated even before penetration. He was so embarrassed that he began to avoid relationships. He read about the stop-start and squeeze techniques and had been practising for years, but they didn’t work. He also ejaculated within seconds while masturbating.

The treatment: Pop a pill

This doesn’t mean your sex life needs to come to a shuddering halt! Ejaculation is a learned behaviour and can be controlled. If a guy consistently ejaculates in less than a minute, it’s a genetic problem with a specific receptor. No amount of sex therapy, psychotherapy or exercise will get it right. I prescribed Nkosi with an SSRI – an antidepressant that works on this particular receptor.

Nkosi takes the SSRI every day and now lasts about 10 minutes. He’s seeing someone now and they’re planning to get married next year.

 

The case: She can’t orgasm

The couple: Lisa and Ben, married for 15 years

Lisa and Ben are happily married, but both feel like they are missing out on something… Despite Ben’s efforts with oral sex, manual stimulation and penetrative sex, Lisa has never been able to have an orgasm. They have also tried using a vibrator together, but to no avail. Lisa comes from a typical Afrikaans household – she found it difficult to embrace her sexuality initially, but now enjoys sex.

The treatment: Take things into your own hands

The first step is always education: only a third of women orgasm from penetration alone and many don’t know that the most sensitive spots are the clitoris and nipples, not the vagina itself. Lisa and Ben were instructed to do erotic massage, sensate focus exercises (where each partner becomes more aware of the sensations they feel) and up their foreplay skills. I changed Lisa’s antidepressant and sorted out her hormones – she was on a Pill that broke down and blocked her testosterone, making orgasms very difficult. She felt better and they enjoyed the exercises, but still no orgasm.

That’s when I suggested masturbation. After all this time, the pressure of losing control in your partner’s presence makes orgasm very unlikely. She had to do it alone. The idea was strange for her, but she gradually became more and more comfortable and eventually had her first orgasm with the help of a small bullet vibrator. By herself. She then did it in his presence and eventually with his help.

When Lisa came for her check-up this year, she mentioned that it is the best thing that she has ever done for herself and for their relationship. Her husband sent me a big bouquet of flowers!

 

The case: She wants more

The couple: Claire and John, have been together for four years

When Claire and John, who has an extremely demanding job, started dating, they had sex almost daily, but for the last year, it only happens about once a month. Claire cried during the consultation and said she feels completely rejected and it’s influenced her self-esteem. She loves him and didn’t want to leave, but would if the problem wasn’t solved.

The treatment: The two Ts (time and testosterone)

When men don’t want to have sex, there is a good reason for it: either psychological or physical. Being a medical doctor, I always exclude the medical first. John had very low testosterone levels – the hormone he needs for libido. Due to stress, the stimulation of the testis to produce testosterone was shut down. He didn’t make time for any exercise, ate poorly, didn’t sleep enough and was constantly worried about work. He needed to look after himself and de-stress. John was shocked to see how his lifestyle affected his health, and made radical changes. I also advised them to plan for intimacy twice a week, have date nights and do fun things together.

Three months later, they are having sex at least once a week, John’s testosterone is back to normal and Lisa is beaming.

 

NOTE:
  • All images courtesy of Google.
  • Content courtesy of Women’s Health.

RSG: Pynlike Seks en Lae Libido (Podcast: Painful Sex and Low Libido)

RSG: Seks en Jy, 22 Julie 2016.

Martelize Brink gesels met Dr. Elmari Mulder Craig en Dr. Elna Rudolph oor seksuele disfunksie by vroue, met die fokus op pynlike seks en lae libido.

Wedding Night – What to Expect

Published by Femagene.

Many newlyweds experience nervousness before their first night of having sex. This educational video will give you some peace of mind of what to expect and how to curb the tension.

No sex, no baby

By Dr. Elna Rudolph. Published in The Specialist Forum, Jan/Feb 2015.

For those who do not desire to fall pregnant, it seems almost unavoidable and for those couples who would desperately like to have a child, it can feel almost impossible. We have some of the most advanced treatment technologies for the management of the infertile couple in SA, but in some cases it is not necessary. We just need to help the couple have successful intercourse.

Read the full article here.